don't tell me what I should and shouldn't eat, especially if you are uneducated

You’d think because of my 13 year diagnosis of anorexia nervosa, people would not tell me what I “should” and “shouldn’t” eat. Well to my dismay they do. The latest craze is this whole “organic” thing. People think I will miraculously be cured if I were to eat “clean” or organic. If that were the case, there would be no need for treatment centers and clinics.

If anyone knows me, they know I am a coffee-a-holic. I cannot function without my morning, afternoon, and well, to be honest, all hours of the day coffee. Whenever someone asks me how I take my coffee, or watches me make my coffee, I always seem to get scolded by how I take it. Yes, I am a fan of Splenda, sweet and low, and all artificial sweeteners.  I am automatically told I am “going to get cancer” or the negative side effects of artificial sweeteners. They tell me I “shouldn’t” use Splenda and to just use sugar. Number one, never tell an anorexic they shouldn’t eat something. We already have enough rules in our head when it comes to food, we don’t need your thoughts in addition to that. We don’t need to add more rules to our rigid diets. Not to mention, we already feel judged when we go to eat or drink anything. This just confirms our fair.

The other thing, if you’re going to give any education or advice on what is healthy for your body or not, you need to make sure you are getting it from credible sources. This does NOT include Facebook article, or most internet articles.  My dietitian told me it takes AT LEAST 5 bath tub loads of artificial sweetener to even slightly increase your chances of getting cancer.

Now people are telling me to “try eating organic” not only is the list of foods I will eat less than a sticky note, people are misled to what organic food is. I am currently taking nutrition in my college courses, and organic is not what people thing. In my reliable text book, I have discovered that organic foods is not what people think it is. One may think that only natural substances would be considered organic, but synthetic fertilizers, pesticides, and food additives are allowed on the national list. Most people believe that there are no pesticides, herbicides, medications, or chemicals of any kind used in organic foods which is not valid.

So not only does is aggravate me when someone tells me what I should and shouldn’t eat, but also when the person is presenting inaccurate information. Number one rule in someone who has an eating disorder-DON’T TELL THEM WHAT THEY SHOULD AND SHOULDN’T EAT. Especially when you are uneducated.

To the americans about the election

Just like many Americans, I am saddened, scared, and terrified over the announcement over the election results. What feeling that I am experiencing the most? Shock. Shock that so many people in a country I live in would want a bully as president. Yes, a bully. And go ahead, you can call me a bully for calling him names, at this point, I do not care. If there is one thing I have learned over the years of therapy I have received for the treatment of my anorexia nervosa and PTSD, it is not to care what people think or say about me.

What is scarier than having a bully, racist, sexist, homophobic, prejudice, hateful man win, is knowing that I am part of a country of people that allowed this to happen.  I grew up being taught that the country I live in is free. Which includes free of hate, free of racism, free of bullying, and a place that I should feel safe in. But I don’t.

First of all, bullying is never ok.  It really hits close to home when he is bullying people for the same things that I struggle with. One being disability. I will never unsee the time he mimicked the disabled man’s arms and called him dumb. He acted as though we was a worthier person because he does not have a disability. What does this mean for those who do have disabilities? Are we going to lose our funding? Are we all going to become homeless simply because we are not as fortunate as those who can work fulltime jobs? I too have a disability, a few. I call them invisible disabilities because when you look at me, or talk to me, you might not assume that I am disabled.  My anorexia, depression, gastroparesis, and postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome makes It almost impossible to work a full time job. Without my disability assistance I would be homeless, or more likely dead. What is even more hurtful is how many people complain sbout needing to pay taxes. I would be happy to be fortunate enough to pay taxes to help someone in need like myself. I have even encountered people who know I am on disability and complain about the assistance people receive. So many take for granted being healthy enough to work.

Some people know, others do not know that I am a sexual abuse and rape survivor. With all the comments he has made towards woman, seeing us as objects and items, it has infuriated me to the maximum. Not only that, I feel unsafe to have him as president for us women.  He rates woman on a “1-10” scale saying “woman who do not have breasts are impossible to be a 10.” We are more than looks, we are more than a sexual object, and hell most of us are more intelligent than a lot of men are. How is it safe to have a president who talks this way about woman? How is it morally ok!?

His racism is unbelievable. Sure, he may not be attacking blacks, but attacking Muslims and Latinos Is the EXACT same thing. Saying all Muslims are terrorists is like saying all black people are drug dealers and criminals.

How do we explain this man to our children? How do we justify all the wrongful things he has said and done? A child is supposed to look up to a president. I remember being in elementary school and how many of my classmates wanted to be president when they got older. Trump is not a good role model for our children to look up to as president. How do we teach our daughters how valuable they truly are when their president says the opposite? How do we teach our sons to treat woman with respect when their president does not? How do we tell our kids that bullying is wrong when our president is a bully?

I can’t believe the beautiful country I live in contains so many people who are willing to stand by and possibly watch it disintegrate like snow on a hot surface. It is only a matter of time before hell breaks loose.  There have already been horrible things happening such as the following; American Muslim women who wear the hijab agonized over whether it’s still safe to wear it, demonstrators have set fires and overturned cars in major cities across America, global financial markets have gone haywire, former KKK leader David Duke declared tonight ‘one of the most exciting nights of my life,’ shares in renewable energy companies tanked, while shares in arms companies surged to a record high, Russia’s political establishment celebrated, Canada’s immigration website crashed under the demand of American visitors, Jihadi leaders welcomed the new US president, and Mexico’s foreign minister made it clear they wouldn’t pay for a wall. And this is all in only 24 hours.

I don’t care how outraged people get by my blog post. I write to share my thoughts and feelings and truths. I don’t write to please others.